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Lyrics - The Ballad of Captain Brimstone
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calico jennyOur Cappy was in rare old form on the day that we set sail,
Two sheets to the wind and a list to port in the eye of a running gale.
He snuck into his cabin hole to have another nip
When a pirate brig hove into view, intent to take our ship.
They bore in close to board us, and we were sore afraid.
Unarmed we were and cargoes full, it's a fine prize we'd a madeā€¹
When suddenly from underfoot, there came the cannon's roar.
Old Cap, you see, was sound asleep, and he'd begun to snore.
It was as fowl as fowl can be
When Cappy let 'er rip
It made the biscuit crumble
And the rats abandon ship
It shook the salt right out our sails
And rattled off the boom
And that pirate fled full speed ahead
Of sure and certain doom!
Now Cappy he dined out one night on snakes and escargot.
He drank his fill of native swill, then crept on down below.
No sooner did he shut the hatch, we heard a fearful row,
And right on cue a pirate crew stood off the starboard bow.
But Cappy he came up on deck, his guts all in a crunch.
He staggered to the portside rail about to lose his lunch.
And then there came a mighty blow; those pirates reeled aghast.
For Cap let out a belch as loud as any musket blast.
Cappy took himself a wife and picked himself a beauty,
All crimp and court and built for sport, a right plump London Judy.
They shared a nuptial banquet made of lobscouse and plum duff,
And went cavorting down below, when a pirate showed above.
He'd a sneer upon his swarthy lips and a cold look in his eye,
And we were taking bets this time we'd kiss our ship good-by.
But Cappy's missus climbs on deck, her skirts up high and smart.
She flashed the moon at that picaroon, and blast him with a fiddle-di-dee.
The Frenchies had Napoleon; at least till Waterloo.
The Yankees had their John Paul Jones to sail the ocean blue.
And plenty are the sailors who have heard the cannon's roar
And had to do their business with the sharpside of a sword.
And Cappy, too, was fearless. He had courage and to spare.
Undaunted he would shake his fist at blackguards foul and fair.
One look and they would turn their tails to flee the devil's woe.
Old Cappy's breath was quite enough to vanquish any foe.


©  Janie Meneely 2003

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